H and I had a little R talk this weekend, but not much. He says now that he's angry or annoyed with me a lot, and that he doesn't feel like he can act like himself. Sometimes I wonder if he just doesn't steal my feelings instead of having original one's of his own. I talked about how I feel so much pressure to be perfect. I have to give him some credit for working on that one. We were waxing the cars yesterday; and he kept saying that little mistakes were okay.
We ended up having a long money discussion. It is the first time that we really talked about what we expected our lifestyle to be like in the future. We didn't make any firm plans, but we talked about what we each wanted. I thought it was very helpful.
We also discussed how we could get all of his furniture back into the house, since we've both expanded our furniture collection since he moved out. I have to remind myself that settling where to put things does not settle the issue of whether or not he will actually do it. I kept reminding him to be flexible, since he is very attached to a particular arrangement of his furniture. In the end we got a plan and he started reminding me every time he is flexible.
I asked him last night if he got to act like himself this weekend. I wasn't entirely able to understand his answer, even after he clarified. I "think" he was saying that he let his defenses down and tested the waters a few times. He didn't say it was a disaster, so I guess it must have worked out okay for him.
As for me the zoloft seems to be working. I'm generally in a good mood now. Even when H annoys me I feel like I have a little more perspective to think about it. I still need to work on not interupting him. Hope everyone has a good week. --z
