It's comforting to read these posts. My WW is in the same situation right now. She has not -- to my knowledge -- been spending time with OM, but she works with him every day. She's told me how lucky she is to be loved by "two wonderful men" -- which almost makes me sick to my stomach.
I'm starting to become more prayerful and realize that, at this point, God needs to do the majority of the work. Until she is ready to commit to the M or to the OM, I can only love her and support her.