If H says he wants to work on relationship and go to counseling. Go for it regardless of situation with OW. Its may be his pessimism about OW and it may be the huge amount of guilt he has about what the situation with OW does to you and your R. I know my husband kept asking the question .. how will you be able to get past things? I just kept telling him I could do it as long as we were working on things together. He was scared about moving home right up until the end and even after he was home. Afraid all of sudden I would say I couldnt live with what he did and I would call it off... So I believe H is feeling alot of things... feelings for OW, guilt about you, guilt about OW, feeling bad about himself... all those things. Only way to get past it is to give him time and let him know you are there for him. So work on R and go to counseling and be patience. You are definitely moving in right direction
