LG, I can't believe you are posting this! My mother called me this morning to tell me about the same sermon. (She is aware that I had lost all respect for my wasband, and we've discussed how this seemed to lead to "the end")
We also discussed how funny it is, that we, as women are simply designed to love.... and how men don't much need or care about that. They just want us to respect them. I used to tell my wasband that he had to EARN respect, it could not be simply granted by me or anyone else. I think my own learning is that I had better not get involved with men who I cannot respect, since I am unwilling to fake it. AND, my respect is CONDITIONAL-- it is based on them behaving in ways I respect. If they behave badly, then my respect is eroded. It's very conditional.
This whole issue also came out in M counseling, near the end of my M. One of his top needs was my respect. Unfortunately, by that time, there was little I could honestly respect, and I was not willing to try lying about it. It did not work to mention abilities that he had but was not applying at present, or things from the past.... so in our case it was simply too late.
BTW, did you ever read or listen to Dobson's "Tough Love"? My pastor went through it with me, it was incredibly helpful and gave guidance that we both felt was very on target.
