So this is piecing...

[trustinginHim]

Spent the morning at church in Bible study and stuffing Christmas stockings for underprivileged children. Very gratifying work. Came rushing home at lunch to feed H and myself.

Before H got home though, I was able to check his email to see if he had addressed the credit card issue with BMOW. He had not that I could tell. So I fed him and let him get a cat nap in, then I asked him if the credit card issue was settled.

His response was not *quite* as defensive of BMOW as it has been in the past, but he is still defensive none-the-less and still not accepting his part in all this. He lectured me for about 15 minutes on why he can't/won't address the card issue with her, after having a meeting with one of the other business partners about it this morning.

He said that if he contacts her it will establish an open line of communication with her and he doesn't want that, nor does he want to accuse her of anything or rile her in any way. The reason being is that if BMOW IS riled, he is afraid that she will publically humiliate him and thus indirectly affect me, perhaps even cause him to lose his job, if she wanted to take it to that level. He said that when he discovered how vindictive she was, that was when he knew that he no longer wanted anything to do with her romantically. Instead, he remains tied to her because of this business that she refuses to leave, just yet, if ever, because he fears her doing to him what he knows she is capable of. For those of you not in the know, BMOW has a father worth about 350 million dollars, and yes I have met him and know his financial worth to be true. Thus, she has the resources to do major, vindictive harm if she so chooses.

One of the discussions H and I had yesterday involved the divorce proceedings I had started last fall, then dropped later. He mentioned that one of his colleagues divorced using the same lawyer I chose and that this lawyer subpoenaed the OW of the colleague's H and put her on the stand. I said that this lawyer would have done that to BMOW in our divorce if it had gone that far. H said that yes, he and BMOW had discussed it and were aware of that, but weren't worried because her father would have hired an expensive, nasty lawyer to "mop the courtroom floor" with me! How do you respond to that? I didn't and changed the subject.

Well, at least he is no longer saying that he is protecting me from her. Essentially, he is walking on eggshells because of BMOW! That never made any sense when he said in the past that he was protecting me anyway. He is REALLY worried about what she would do to HIM if she felt he had slighted her in any way.

His defense of her comes when he says that she has worked so hard on the business and that she deserves anything good that comes of it. All this for a woman he met on a sex personals website. Sheesh.

So his plan is to let sleeping dogs lie. (Ha ha--his words!) Do not provoke her and when she gets tired of playing at the business, she will just go away. Now, on the flip side, there is a strong possibility that by this time next year, the business, if it lasts that long, could actually start making money for reasons I am unable to disclose here, yet. He asked me if that happens and BMOW is rolling in the dough from the success of the company and we aren't because he completely severed ties with the company, now how would that make ME feel???? Gee, how WOULD I feel living off the sweat of BMOW's hard work?? Personally, I think there are other more qualified business managers who could do just as well or an even better job than her AND my H hasn't slept with them!! Well, that I know of.

So, again, my H has reiterated that BMOW will NOT be provoked in any way, and he is not going to completely sever ties with the company "just in case". The goal here is to hope that BMOW will just go away when she gets tired of playing business manager to a dot-com business that may ultimately fail. BUT it also could make some bucks and if that happens he said he and I will be traveling the US in our fully loaded RV or perhaps traveling abroad and BMOW will be slaving away back here, the furthest thing from our minds.

So, anybody want to take a stab at what phase of MLC he is still in? Who knows? Maybe this is the depression still talking. I am INCREDIBLY aware that H still harbors much bitterness and resentment toward me and still sees BMOW as someone worth deserving some sort of special consideration in his life--THAT is very apparent and also probably the reason/excuse that we aren't ML.

Well, all this is H's problem--not mine in the slightest. I will NOT be letting any of this nonsense affect me! He is ALL yours Lord--Your will, Your way and in Your time. I am placing this burden at the foot of the Cross.

LG--feeling much peace and comfort from her Lord today