Was reading your updates of the past few months and I understand where you are. I know that you have put enormous effort in trying to turn this around, making progress here and there, but eventually it all falling back to the status quo and you have nothing to show for it. Take your time in deciding what to do next. When the time is right, you will feel peace with your decision, whatever that may be.
You are an incredible woman, so don't let your H lull you into thinking that you aren't because he can't appreciate you and honor the vows that he took with you. You have done the vast majority of work in your marriage and are entitled to some of the rewards from it, namely time and effort from your H for you and the kids.
