How is your H performance when you do ML, does he satisfy you, and does he have any difficulty finishing with you? Has your H always been LD?
There could be any number of reasons he is LD towards you, performance anxiety, guilt, but I think it is all related to the porn. This is his addiction and I think him coming to terms with it can only help your M. I found this link to be helpful.
You are still faced with the problem of convincing your H that you mean business. I can tell you from experience that having an A will only destroy your M. Hopfully some wiser DBers than I can help you through your difficulties.
