I feel for you. I really do, trust me, I know what it is like to live in a marriage with no sex or affection...I think I come close to holding the record here, I've had sex once in the past seven years (which happened to result in the subsequent birth of beautiful twin boys.)
But...of course it's hard to know the dynamics of your relationship after one post, but how do you think your wife sees things? I know you've said that she's read the book and admitted a problem, but it may be she's doing these things to keep you at bay - to avoid dealing with the 'big problem' whatever that may be.
Quote: Meanwhile, I know damn good and well that if she put even a tenth of the effort into fixing this situation as she puts into things that are important to HER . . . it would be fixed by the time I got home tonight. My only conclusion therefore is that this is not important to her.
What things are important to her? Have you shown an interest in them? Be careful drawing conclusions on your own. I know very well that the reality I see and the one my H sees are not always what a 3rd party would see...the mark of a fused relationship.
Your name indicates that you haven't been married long. How long? What were things like before marriage? What attracted you to W in the first place?
I know it feels like you are the one putting in all the work right now, but the only thing you can do is look at yourself. It will affect your W, maybe not in the ways you want, but you will grow. You say you've been trying to make her happy...the only persons happiness you can really affect is your own. I know that sounds a little sappy, but try it anyway. Stop worrying about what your W thinks, and think about what you think.
