Nothing happened last night; my optimism was premature I guess!
I think that I could have orchestrated the events so that it ended in ML but at the end of the day (literally and figuratively) I just didn't have the motivation. I really wanted and needed him to be more of an active participant. When I realized that I was dealing with a person whose fondest desire was to go to sleep, it sucked any motivation right outta me.
I was momentarily ticked off and was besieged with thoughts of, "gosh dammit if I am not doing all the work and trying to seduce him, nothing happens! He never takes the initiative himself...blahblah" Much resentment flying about my brain.
But I managed to fall asleep without doing or saying anything stupid. This morning I feel fine. I wish he had made a move but he did write early this morn and apologize for "literally passing out on you last night". So he did at least acknowledge that he was being a dud. (all of this stems from the fact that he made a promise to me on Sun night to give one of my body parts "attention" for the next 3 days...it was HIS idea, I did not prompt it--well needless to say this has not happened)
I wish he wouldn't make promises he doesn't intend to keep. Or, here is a better way to say it: Even if he intends to keep them at the moment they are spoken, he should realize that he does not have the right to blow it off completely. One night cause he's tired? Sure, I'm not a dang dictator. Even two nights? Yeah whatever. But to act as if nothing was ever said? That is unacceptable.
However, nothing will get discussed or accomplished in regards to this as tomorrow is D4's birthday. I will be busy getting things ready and without my constant loving and physical presence he won't be able to step up to the (extra large these days) plate. Oh well! D4 is turning 5! How exciting that my baby is getting so big. She is a really special and wonderful child, with an exuberant personality. Her humor and zest for life will keep me buoyed, I'm sure.
Mojo, Here is an off topic for you, since you deal in obscure books. Any idea where I can find a certain cookbook for children? I do not know the title or author. It was recommended to me as a present for my nephew but I can't seem to find anything resembling it. It is called "Superhero Cookbook" or something like that. With drawings of Superman et al cookin up the grub. I know this type of book is probably not your forte, but you might be able to direct me where to search, no? Thanks...
