Don't know if I'm "wise" but I'll take a crack at it...
Your H is in deep pain. He opened up to you--big time--and you did a great job of validating.
My guess is now he's crawled back up into his cave for a little while to process some more. It was a flood for him, and now he needs some alone time. It's too much to handle all at once.
BTW...haha...OW got tired of hearing about you. That's a good sign.
Oh--I keep noticing his theme of "I didn't know that you loved me." That's the reason he's citing for the affair. He responds to affection very well (but right now doesn't want the sexual understones).
I'm thinking maybe a nice e-card...maybe something with some light humor?...to let him know you're thinking of him. So he knows you care, but you're not "intruding" on his space. Or maybe a nice e-mail "I know you're having a hard time, just wanted to tell you ILY."
I don't think questioning him on his pulling back would be helpful. I did notice that he's asked you several times for comfort. Maybe you could wander by his area later and leave him a small present? Like with a cute note?
