Oh Deb,

I have to confess that reading your thread makes me wistfully yearn for the days when it seemed like my H and I were moving closer together and not further apart. Hard to believe that was just a month ago.

You are singing my song about distance that was created in a marriage through mis cues and poor communication. I can remember H even saying "you never want to listen to me talk about work." And then a few months later he would say "I don't tell you stuff about work becuz I don't want to worry you." And I thought I was listening but for some reason he didn't perceive it that way.

There were also many misunderstandings about sex I had to have things just so b4 I was even interested. I needed to feel loved to and H needed to to show his love.

And I think I thought that my H was not the type to have an A, that he was a faithful devoted family man. Esp since his dad took their family down with his own A, I thought H would never go that route.

One day I am going to start a thread devoted to people's history of infidelity in their and their spouses family of origin. I am guessing that the seed doesn't fall too far from the tree and the sociologist in me would love to find out.

Any way, it seems like you are keeping on your toes, monitoring what works and doesn't. Keep the faith.

hugs,

Pam