Chronicles of Morphing into a Red Hot Momma

[sage]

Sage, If you read this, I believe I recall you posted on my earlier thread that you pursued your H....In what way did you pursue him?

Deb -- Well, first off, early on in DB days I definitely didn't pursue h (back when he was unsure about whether or not to stay in the M) but I was OPEN to being around him and didn't aggressively use the DB tactic of "getting a life" since part of the problem was that I HAD a VERY ACTIVE life that had little or nothing to do with my h or M...

But, I'd say that you're we're both past that phase now, right? so a bit of pursuit ....

Early days I brought home videos or DVDs that I knew he would be interested in -- I'd ask if he wanted to watch with me.

I snuggled up and watched the stuff that he was watching on TV -- even if it wasn't normally something that interested me

Same with reading stuff on-line or in the paper -- showed a real interest in the things that he was interested in.

VERY slowly asked him out on a date...by planning someplace for dinner or a movie that I knew he would like

Would make sure that the food he liked was stocked in the fridge!

Would celebrate a special occasion with champagne (or a fancy beer!)

Etc.

The key for me was showing 100% enthusiasm for his interests and being focused when he was talking.

ONE thing that is CRITICAL is to NOT overdo this -- I think you are as high energy as I am and it's VERY easy to get sucked into planning EVERYTHING (that will take the wind our of his sails!) -- so plan things but only half as often as you might want -- but do it with 100% enthusiasm!

Sage