Understanding My Travel Companion

[xalelle]

So for us, understanding why is the mechanism to get to the deeper issue of NG's self esteem. How did I contribute to it? I was frankly so wrapped up in myself I was not the kind of partner he needed. I have real passion for my job, it is interesting and challenges me. Somewhere along the line I had failed to give NG the kind of attention he wanted - something OW was happy to do. Post the A, well, let's just say that I have had a long hard look at my own priorities and as exciting as the job is, it is taking a back seat to my family and friends, NG being top of that list.

This is so true in my sitch as well, and played a big part in it. I have had a very successfull carieer that started after we were married, and have grown exponentially. W would make comments like "I will never be as (smart, successfull, etc) as you" - she felt like she was competing with me. I never successfully made her feel her contributions were worth just as much as mine - raising our kids, keeping our home, etc.

OM gets to come in and see just her, be just a noone, and make her feel good without the real life attached. I can do better, but right now it is easier for him to do so!