Quote: Keeping expectations low seems to be a good philosophy for life in general, but in this case, it seems to be the fundamental to avoiding insanity.
Funny thing about expectations ... we seem to be very particular in how we feel others should address them. So much so that in a R where both are working on strengthening the bond, in a lot of cases we miss their way of expressing their efforts to meet our expectations, because their way is not our envisioned method.
There's a grave danger to this type of tunnel vision ... for we lose appreciation in knowing they are meeting our expectations but just in a different way. They lose the encouragement of having their efforts noticed for what they are. They are trying the best way they know how and if neglected they begin to start feeling those efforts are just not good enough and before you know it ... they begin to dwindle. We begin to pick up on their shift in attitude towards the R and become more starved from the lack of nurturing ... a vicious cycle it becomes in a downward spiral. This I can tell you from experience.
So Slowly, I see lotsa sign that NG is trying in his own way to meet your expectations. Learn to accept them for what they are ... as equals to you how you hope he'd show you, because he in his mind he's putting as much effort into it as you preceive he should be and make sure you thank him so he too knows you notice.
Hope this made sense, its my version of the whole Mars vs. Venus thing.
