oooohhhh Betsey - a Mr E on the scene - and you are comfortable sharing this - awesome I was struck by the simplicity of what at the end of the day we are all looking for
Quote: I'm enjoying working on being friends. I have missed having a man's company who can converse about things... books (including self help genre!), life, kids, weather, sports (good thing he likes hockey) and he seems to like hanging out with me. What a refreshing change from the steady diet of indifference and avoidance? What girl doesn't like a guy who is willing to express his enthusiasm for being present in whatever shape or form that holds?
How quickly we complicate things, when in reality this is what we all crave for most...
Thanks once again, Betsey, for having just the right words. Slowly
I'm having the most insane and horrific day here at work and have barely had time to hit the bathroom. Which is why I've not been able to do anything today. But since I'm now frustrated enough to rebel against authority (um, that would be myself), I'm here for a few minutes anyway.
Mr. Wonderful is back to his usual jovial and joking self. We had a most hilarious chat earlier, when I got to tell him all about D10 and her desire to grow up. He told me he's really glad he's not the mom.
Nor was he surprised to hear of the sitter's dismay at D7's latest antics.
We also had a couple fun chats yesterday as well. We were discussing the constant barrage of drama that seems to follow us around. I asked him, "Well, our whole lives have been nail biters. Can you remember a time when they weren't this way?"
He gave a gut busting laugh and said, "Yeah, actually I do. 1989. That was our best year ever!"
It was also the year we were dating/engaged, having lots of fun and without any responsibility. I laughed aloud as well and commented, "Well, gee, not much has changed since then, has it????"
Nahhh... not much......
Slowly, not to bring Mr. E. into this fray (because this is not about him, and I think he would be MOST uncomfortable with me discussing our progressing friendship and anything else that might be progressing here online)... but yes, the simplicity of just enjoying the wonderful aspects of human interaction is a lovely thing.
I appreciate his patience and friendship as they are truly gifts. Hey, everyone in my office is thrilled about this new turn of events. I have them cheering for me in the warehouse at the end of the day...
Now if I could only get him to like Bon Jovi, D10 and I would sigh relief....
Bets
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
But, but, but... I don't give love a bad name? Or at least nobody has ever sung that to me before?
I'm having a bit of a grieving evening. Frankly, it caught me by surprise. The tears have passed and I'm going to head off to spend some QT with D10 (her LL) as soon as she finishes her homework. I guess she wanted to wait until I got home to do it.
Mr. Wonderful and I typically attend back-to-school nights individually, as they fall on different nights. We take turns every year swapping the kids. He attended D10's last week, and I attended D7's tonight.
She loves school and has the same teacher for 2nd grade as she did for 1st. And some parents recognized me and mentioned that their kids love D7. One of the dads has known her for 3 years know and has fallen in love with her.
However, for one hour, I sat through a beautiful presentation given by her teacher of the 2nd grade curriculum and all the wonderful things that the kids were doing. It was absolutely grueling for me.
I realized that D7 won't be doing any speeches about anything. She won't be able to take any spelling tests. She won't be able to give a weekly book report. She won't be able to work with any proficiency at math. It was all I could do to not leave early.
I got home and found Mr. Wonderful sitting on the couch--D10 was up in her room and D7 was in the bathtub. He asked me how it was and I burst into tears. Then I started sobbing about how much I hate this and how doggone much this hurts. And for the first time in a long time, he started to tear up too.
He said quietly, "Bets, why didn't you ask me to take hers too? I had no idea that this was so awful for you?" I managed to squeak out, "It's okay, it just took me by surprise. I've felt a little of this before, but for some reason, I just got blindsided." He just nodded and said he understood.
I walked upstairs to find her eating shaving cream in the bathtub (don't ask). He walked up on my heels, grabbed me, hugged me and let me cry. And I appreciated it.
There are lots of things I'm really glad about, but others make me really profoundly sad. D10 reminded me that maybe one day she'll be able to hold a job. I just hope someone creates one for a girl who thinks she's a cat.
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
I know there are things in life which can’t be improved through words, and shouldn’t be minimized by them, even in a helpless attempt to make someone feel better. D7s condition is one of those. Every parent has hopes and dreams for their children, and to realize that much of what you wanted for your daughter will never be possible must be terrible painful.
I know you believe God put each and every one of us on this Earth for a purpose, and that D7 has hers. And that she will be happy in life – happier than many people without disabilities. That she will touch people’s hearts through her life and open them to thoughts they had never considered ... as she is already charming teachers, classmates, camp friends, and everyone she meets. I can’t tell you how much my life was touched and charmed by special needs children (and adults), and changed for the better. In this overly materialistic world, we desperately need them to keep in touch with our fundamental humanity. Especially when they think they are cats. *smile*
But knowing all this, it is still ok to mourn for those dreams. Or have a day when everything just seems too much to bear.
You're such an inspiration, Betsey - in every sense of the word.
Can you get me a date with Mr. E? He seems like my type and that would guarantee I don't commit adultery and get ex-communicated before I even get communicated .
I'm very happy for you, but hope you've got some minor league hockey clubs to make up for the NHL strike.
Oh, and as for how long it took H to get over his ex’ new BF .... not long. I think when he first heard about him H was genuinely insulted that she’d consider dating anyone else after having been with him….or something to that effect. Now, they are very cordial and can talk computers for hours. I imagine it’ll be another adjustment if they get married and he moves in, becoming official “stepfather” to H’s kids, but I don’t foresee any major difficulties.
Mr. W will be all right, trust me. And Mr E’s a lucky fella.
Thank you so much for your words. I internalize them, but it's nice to hear them from another's lips (or keyboard). Believe me, her blessings FAR outweigh her difficulties, but I guess I'm never too far from wishing things were different for her.
More than anyone, I know what her gifts are. And there are days when I would gladly trade my so-called intelligence for her outlook on life. It would be far easier to live that way. But who would be talking to D10 about boys and sex?
Maybe Merrick, since he wants to be introduced to Mr. E?
Uh, Merrick, I don't think you're going to be eligible for entry to the church if you want that type of R with him. Plus even though you ARE each other's types? I'm pretty sure he would rather commit adultery with me than you!
Hey, you know that I'm laughing as I write this, right?
I'm still bummed about hockey season, and resigned to sitting this year out on the bench. We don't have the minor league teams here like you do. Plus, if Mr. E. can't find it in his heart to accept the fact that I'm really in love with Joe Sakic, well, I don't know what I'll do....
Too bad Joe is already happily married with 3 kids of his own. But he lives really close to my church, so maybe I could sneak through those electronic gates and give him a surprise? Naked? Would you come visit me in jail?
Enough of this, because I really have to get to work. It was a painfully busy day yesterday and I foresee more of the same today.
Take care!
Betsey
p.s. Pen, Mr. E. is as lucky as I am!
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
Hello Betsey.... Well, you've proven your point--that you are human as you mentioned on my thread.
I'm not sure how to extend into 36 hr days but I sure have found a way to make the most of the 24 hr ones---skip sleep! Well, not exactly an ideal thing but I know that I've cut back on my hrs of sleeptime in order to maximize the rest of the time for whatever reason. Unfortunately with this method it does "eventually" catch up w/you. LOL
Just wanted you to know I'm thinking of you. You're a special woman and let's firm up that visit when you get over this neck of the woods during the holidays! Take care and have a better day (I know you will ). Tootles..........
Slowly 
Betsey 
