The weekend was OK, not exactly good for the M in any way (no talks, no cuddling, no LM - but I didn't expect any anyways), but very productive for me. I cleaned up a lot and threw a crapload of stuff out. The kids left me alone on Saturday, so I made sure to do as much as I could.
As far as I know, W is still recovering from the procedure (I didn't ask though, so who knows). She had a yearly physical on Saturday, and her internist is giving her another SSRI to try for her anxiety (the first 3 didn't do too much besides upset her stomach). This is the 4th "antidepressant/anti-anxiety" med that she's on in the past year. Each time she switches, there's like a 3-week period of time when she's experiencing side effects. I can only hope that this one is gonna stop her from blowing up at the kids all the time (she yells a LOT when D6 and D2 are acting up & won't listen).
I have a real issue with W yelling all the time, and I've told her about it over and over. She doesn't seem to remember my concerns until it's too late and she's yelled at D6 or D2 for something-or-other. I play along and be the nice parent, asking my kids questions about why mommy is yelling and trying to understand their point of view. I have noticed that D6 (who is usually more friendly with my W) comes to me for a hug or a talk after W has yelled at her. That's kinda nice.
So, as far as this week goes, we'll see if W initiates anything. I'm not going to. I can go another few weeks without LM. It hasn't been high on my priority list recently, probably because I'm reading PM and thinking a lot. It also could be that I'm not attracted to my W physically anymore. She has gained 40 pounds in the past year, and she's not caring much about her current body image. She has even said, "I feel like my ass has a new zip code, and I'll get back into dieting one day. I just don't feel like it now." I usually let it go, thinking that silence is better than a sarcastic comment that will start a fight. You know women and weight issues... NEVER say anything 'cause ya can't win.
PM and I will be good friends this week. I have a feeling that arguments will be easier to win after I have all the ammunition I need to throw things back in W's face. I'll probably sound pissy to her, but maybe she'll hear the message.
