Return of the DBRookie

[DBrookie]

After a few months doing some soul searching and working on myself I thought I would check back in. You might remember me from: HD WAW now LD / The BIG Test

I moved to a new city in May and was waiting for the divorce papers to show up. It was one part "Going Silent" from Divorce Busting and one part putting myself in a place to restart my life.

And then a funny thing happened. The divorce busting part actually appears to have work. W and I have begun speaking again, have spent a few weekends together, and both of us are talking about how we both want to work things out.

Now for the SSM portion of all of this. Despite a lot of quality time and talking...W has stopped me several times while putting the moves on her. We spent last weekend together and we talked at length about our sexual roadblock.

W said that she can't force herself to ML with me because she's still very hurt about the past. She knows that I've taken responsibility for a lot of the problems of the past, but for the first time she's taken responsibility for the past and present.

W said that she doesn't know why her body won't respond to something her mind wants. She tenses up, feels ill, and pushes me away when we're in very close quarters. I told her that I think she's just trying to protect herself from getting hurt, and I understand that.

She says that she's been trying to push past this intimacy roadblock with me because she really wants to ML but just can't. I guess I'm looking for some feedback about how I can keep showing interest without pressure...and what might be going through her mind.