Tony, Tony, Tony... Are we feeling a bit harsh tonight? My LD status never came to a point where I wanted my Hs bits severed and I certainly never wanted him to become a woman (eek, imagine John Goodman as a woman)!!
I don't mind the sun sometime
The images it shows
I can taste you on my lips
And smell you in my clothes
Cinnamon and Sugar
And softly spoken lies
You never know just how you look
Through someone elses eyes
BHS-"Pepper"
Quote: Tony, Tony, Tony... Are we feeling a bit harsh tonight? My LD status never came to a point where I wanted my Hs bits severed and I certainly never wanted him to become a woman (eek, imagine John Goodman as a woman)!!
Um, my ascerbic wit has run amok I fear.
This falls under the "so funny I forgot to cry" category. At my lowest moments I have felt emasculated. Enough self pity! I'm in the midst of cleaning the spew off of my monitor caused by picturing John Goodman in drag .
SM
"If we will be quiet and ready enough, we shall find compensation in every disappointment." Henry David Thoreau
LOLOL. I was imagining your H as a really hyper,little skinny guy. Sort of like a short Jim Carrey. This is probably because I think of you as tiny because you named yourself "nymph" and I imagine all really horny guys to be sort of adolescent looking.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
Okay, I've been reading the archives again... really interesting stuff. I'll say it again: you people are so g-d SMART! And funny, too.
But to answer the question posed by the title of this thread: Yes you can love a spouse who has ND, but I don't think you can be truly married to them. To me, by definition, married love has a sexual dimension to it-- a sexual dimension to the feelings themselves. If a marriage has no sex in it, what makes it different from living with your parents, roommate, kids, etc.?
By sex, I don't necessarily mean the ol' in-and-out. I mean sexual vibes, tension, desire, energy between the two of you. If one person (or both, for that matter) became so physically disabled that any kind of genital or even physical stimulation were impossible, as long as they could still talk, type, or look at each other, they could communicate desire. Or if they were separated physically by distance (one is stranded permanently in a space station on Mars), they could still email or talk by radio.
But if one spouse truly does not see the other spouse as an actual or potential sex partner (even in fantasy), then it's not a sexual relationship, and in my mind, not a marriage.
Does this make sense, or am I way off base?
An analogy: To me, a meal, by definition, has to include food. You can buy the dishes, the groceries, the pots and pans, set the table, put on the music, light the candles... but unless there's food and the consumption thereof, there's no meal.
Interestingly... eating peanut butter crackers in the car COULD be a meal... have to think about the implications of this analogy... need Pringles...
Lillie: That was a great post. I certainly love my wife, but she feels much more like a roommate than what I consider a wife to be. She dismisses these feelings I have by saying that "it's always about sex. Well, it's not ALWAYS about sex, but sex has to be there to support the rest of the structure.
.