MM wrote: This board, SSM and PM gave me hope for my marriage because they gave me hope that by changing myself I could increase the passion in my marriage. -----------------------
I know I'm going to get blasted for this, but I truly believe that the W has more power to affect this than the H.
If my HD/LD were reversed in my sitch, there is no question but that my W would get changes in our sex life from me that would last forever. I'm unable to get the same results. That's not to say that she'd be completely fulfilled by the results she got (as w/Mr. Wilson and Mr. HP), but she'd definitely be able to move us from where we are.
I'm aware that our sex life will never get to a place of priority w/my W. And it's my fault. By putting up with it, I trained her that she doesn't have to make it a priority. My opportunity for that is gone. It's still the area of greatest pain for me, but there are responsibilities that are of greater importance, namely my kids. When they're grown, I'll have to see what is most important then.
Monk, my suggestion to you would be to ask your W if she's OK w/you having your sexual needs met w/someone else. If she's not, ask her what she suggests you do. You still need to eat even though she's decided she's through cooking.
