MM clarified: I should have said "My fear is that most men would end up relatively HD to me in the long run." ------------------
OK, that's a completely different thing. That's the same fear that enters my mind when I consider the HDW sexual attitude that you and others have expressed here. But I know that's not the case for me. I had sex this morning and am very ready to go for a nooner. Further, I would consider that every playful grope that was not accompanied by a genuine readiness for sex (whether fulfilled or not) would be a tease for that imaginary HDW, and therefore unfair. I have no trouble seeing a RL morning and night schedule for sex as a physical reality, with occassional "attacks" at other times. How long that would continue would be determined by the variety, excitement and enthusiasm we would both bring to the R.
Mike - trips to Fantasyland are great, aren't they? The return trip to reality sucks, though.
MM stated: I was kind of joking, but I was suggesting a partner-free contest. I suggested that I could probably orgasm 12x in one day. ---------------------
Forgive my density, folks, but could someone tell me what is the big deal about orgasming 12x in one day? I'm reading that as if that's only possible for a W. Puleeeeeease!
An inquiring mind inquired: Well, Barn, inquiring minds want to know. Have you? --------------------
Absolutely! It was certainly not a regular thing, but it has been done.
And I'd like to clarify something. Obviously, the W has a greater physical potential for Os than the M. But in a RL HD sexual R, I wouldn't consider my O as necessary for every sexual encounter. For example, I would attack the imaginary HDW as she put clothes in the washing machine with gropes that led to her O, kiss her neck afterward, walk away with the Cheshire Cat grin and count that as one time having sex for the day.
Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't be OK with that as the ONLY way to count it, but my HDM status wouldn't be threatened by the times she Od and I didn't. IOW, my tongue and fingers aren't hindered by "recovery time".
Quote: I have always wondered why a LD woman would NOT want her husband to have an affair. If sex is just sex, then if the husband goes elsewhere to have the sex, why should it bother the LD women in the slightest? In fact, LD woman shoulf openly WANT their husbands to cheat on them, that would take all the pressure off of them to have sex, and is that not what they want? So if the husbands affair bothers the LD women, then she must know deep down sex is CRUCIAL to a good relationship.
I did suggest this to my H. He did not want to.
I will try to shed some light on how I felt about sex and why I suggested this to my H in the first place. When I was LD, sex was like exercise that I abhorred, but did because I didn't want to get fat. Sex did not feel good to me. It was like eating a meal that had previously made me sick. I did not get any benefit from having sex (with the exception of my 2 DSs). It was like listening to music that made me wish I was deaf. Even the thought of sex got my stomach twisted into knots.
I knew that I was being selfish, but had no way of knowing that I could change how I felt about sex. I thought it was my lot in life to feel that way. I endured these feelings and obliged my H as much as I could, but knew in my heart of hearts that it wasn't enough.
I believe that sex (at least for me) has been an aquired taste. I needed a safe (read, one I created and controlled) environment to explore and become comfortable with my sexuality. I believe that being married afforded me the saftey I needed. My H allowed me to try out my burgeoning sexuality with no pressure. We are now reaping the rewards of all these years of pent up passion .
I don't mind the sun sometime
The images it shows
I can taste you on my lips
And smell you in my clothes
Cinnamon and Sugar
And softly spoken lies
You never know just how you look
Through someone elses eyes
BHS-"Pepper"
Quote: sex was like exercise that I abhorred, but did because I didn't want to get fat. Sex did not feel good to me. It was like eating a meal that had previously made me sick. I did not get any benefit from having sex (with the exception of my 2 DSs). It was like listening to music that made me wish I was deaf. Even the thought of sex got my stomach twisted into knots.
So CN, what words of wisdom then do you have for us HD's? I've been following your thread, but still don't have any clear insight as to what made *YOU* decide to start experimenting. How did you get from where my W is now (the stomach in knots over the thought of sex) to wanting to learn about your sexuality? I don't think my LDW will experiment of her own accord (she claims to have never even MB'd and I believe her), and if pressure makes it worse, then what?
