Quote: My plan concerning the privacy issue is to talk to DD9, who is the most problematic about reporting back to her mom the goings-on over here. I also probably need to talk with ex about not encouraging DD9 to tell her what's going on over here, and, if possible to affirmatively discourage her from doing so. I don't know if it would work or not.
Hi hairdog,
De-lurking to say I don’t like it either. I have three stepkids, one of them a teenager, so I can sympathize with your wife up to a point. Teenagers are all twerps, and do I ever remember my own teenage years. It’s a miracle my mother didn’t kill me. Being a stepparent to one can be taxing. BUT , as MegaMojo already said, this isn’t the kids’ problem. I never, ever, EVER say one negative or even slightly grey word about their mother in their presence. What purpose would it serve? She’s their mother, for heavens sake. And they can say whatever they want to her about us – it is up to me to make sure that they don’t have anything negative to report. I’m not going to stifle their communications together by imposing any sort of “taboo”. It’s difficult enough for the kids to move continuously from one family to the other, from one parent to the other. Am I going to make it even harder for them? No way. We’re the adults in this scenario. Somebody has to be!
