Hairdog gets some t 'n' a at the b 'n' b

[MJontheMend]

My plan concerning the privacy issue is to talk to DD9, who is the most problematic about reporting back to her mom the goings-on over here. I also probably need to talk with ex about not encouraging DD9 to tell her what's going on over here, and, if possible to affirmatively discourage her from doing so. I don't know if it would work or not.

I don't like it. You are involving a child in an adult problem. What is going on on your household in front of a 9 year old child that is too secret for her to tell her mother about. Forget about talking to your ex too. What possible motivation could she have for doing what you want? It is the responsibility of adults to behave with discretion around children because "little pitchers have big ears". How do you think your daughter is going to feel, if you basically inform her that she is contributing to your marital problems? If there is something that your wife is doing that she is embarrassed for your ex to learn about, then she just ought to stop doing things she isn't proud of, especially in front of the children.

I don't think the needs of another supposed adult in your life should be more important or even as important as those of your child and I don't think you should make her choose between indulging Mommy's immature curiousity or helping you keep the peace with your immature wife. I feel sorry for little Hansel and Gretel and I think someone should grow some big ones and shove someone right in the oven where she belongs and force her to take the heat that she deserves. Being LD is one thing, being mean to kids is another.