Mo, I don't know if it is society or not. I mean, he has lived with Mojo version 1 all this time and now he is supposed to adjust seamlessly to Mojo version 2 and believe that this was you all those years. He is just doing what any of us would do in that situation--holding on to the person we "know" and not fully seeing (yet) that this is not a change as much as a revelation, finally, of who you really are.
I would imagine it will just take time and consistency on your part for him to see that this is not neediness, or emotions, or a reaction to him traveling or whatever else he is telling himself it might be.
For the longest time, my H would chalk it all up to us having kids. Well I was feeling sex starved before we even conceived D4 (and the first two were almost NOT conceived, as I couldn't get him to have sex on 'the' days) but he has forgotten how it really was. Plus, I suffered in total silence so why should I expect him to have known that the real me was suffering and not enjoying the break?
It is only now, two yrs after me telling him what I was really made of, that he is finally able to see that what I am saying is true...cause it aint changing or dissipating.
Oh, one more thing, it is only recently that he stopped saying things like "Men are not like that..." or "With you being a woman..." etc. He was convinced that we still typified the model of the so-called normal H and W. That we went through a weird period but we still were rooted firmly in the normal roles. It has been a long time since he has said this and I believe that he can probably see now that we are NOT typical and that it applies to a lot of things besides our sex life. However, there are a lot of ways that he is the typical male and I am the typical female. We are not cookie cutter creations that perfectly fit a mold and that's okay. I'm sure he felt it was an assault on his masculinity to admit that his wife was more "manly" in some ways than he is. I doubt he ever stopped to think what it said about me, LOL! I feel that we are both more secure in our roles now and whether it fits into society doesn't matter so much.
I wonder if the news that their wives were sexually unhappy was MUCH harder on our guys' egos than they would ever let on? It would explain much of my H's focus on what "men" are like, etc.
Oh well I'm off to sweat my arse off while the D's ride bikes.
