Deb - you need to take care of you! Plus, how about you start getting up and making phone calls to friends and such? Let him wonder what you are doing! Go out, have fun, and just leave him in the dust for now. Go to Weight Watchers, go to the Y, take up bowling or something. Do things that make you happy, okay? Because this isn't.
He is blaming you, and you aren't the problem. He has to work this out himself, you cannot make him do that. Last year I'd have loved to have sabatoged BF's R with ex-OW, but I didn't. Now, I did pursue him - but I didn't tell her anything that we were doing. It has to be on your H's time, and it HAS to be his choice. It is your choice to either put up with it or not, and I'd understand if you chose not to deal with the crap anymore. But if you try to end it yourself, he may blame you later.
thanks dfb, you reminded me of an important point that I've known but overlooked today....If I end things, I know he will be able to blame me, AND, in a way that lets him off the hook by making his decision for him.......I have been absolutely bound and determined not to do that.
