Quote: H is gone on his 2 --3 hourwalk now, and I did slip and ask him if he meets somebody....of course he said no......
Hi Deb,
I'm still thinking that you should take these opportunities to also be "out and about" occasionally ... while your H is out on his two to three hour walk. (Gosh! That IS a long "walk" isn't it?)
There is a real balancing act that you are going to have to get going here... I'm thinking (there I go again!) that you can still be flirty, very intimate and validating to your H... but you possibly still need to step back a little and get some mystery/? in your life (at least in your H's perception)! Don't be so darned available, Deb! Have fun, let him see that in you ... but also let him see that you are getting on with your life. You need to keep developing You and "doing" for YOU!
Like I have mentioned before .. this really IS a balancing act. Your H may continue on indefinitely, if he thinks that you are going to be the same ol' reliable Deb that he has always been able to count on. My H pretty much came out and said as much as that, in a conversation about how much I had changed. You can be fun. You can be validating and intimate to your H. You can be all of those things...but you need to add more mystery and very visible changes, whereby it is appearing like you might be having "fun" without him.
Doing these types of things really does make you feel good about yourself and it will show. Also, when you are working on "you" throughout this whole ordeal ... it really does help with the patience thing. You don't feel like you are sitting around waiting for you H...'cause your NOT! You are working on making yourself the best that you can be!
