Thanks Nevanna. H ended up being v suppportive during this cycle. They are not always this bad, but I had a headache for 4 days and was v. emotional. I told him that, he gave me snuggles and I didn't get upset about anything with us.
I was looking forward to having fun this weekend. His bday is Sunday so I'm taking him out Sat. night. Then Sunday he is playing race cars all day, then out to din. w/my family to celebrate his and my uncle's bdays.
So, being that h has to take his car to e-check by his bday, he started messing around with it. The check engine light has been on pretty much since he bought it, and guess he procrastinated a little BIT! Turns out he needs a new catalytic converter which is anywhere from $300-$1000. And, after that, the transmission is still messed up, but that wouldn't affect the e-check. (E is for Emissions for those of you who don't have to do this!) So, he started debating what to do-put the work into it or buy a new car. Then he says that he knows what he has to do...that he doesn't have the money for a new car. (He wants a used Taurus SHO). He might be able to get one for a few thousand, but being a performance car, he'll prob want to buy all kindsa pieces parts for it.
He asks me what I think and I say that we should talk about it in person. My gut feeling is v. pissy. He hasn't joined checking accounts yet, we haven't dealt with any money issues together. He paid to have a tree cut down out of his money. I am ASSuming that he is resentful of that, but had he put our money together, it would have been "our" money. The bank acct. is in his hands. When we got married, I added his name to my acct's. So, I called a few weeks ago asking for a debit card for him so he can access it, the lady told me that he had to go in and sign for it. I told him this and he hasn't done it. Mind you, the bank is about 3 min. from our house.
I am looking for a new job, and know I need to make more money, but I still feel like he is acting "single." He spends money on whatever he wants w/in reason, eats whatever lunch he wants, goes out whenever he wants, and hasn't saved a dime (w/the exception of always having the $1000 cushion he had when we met). I on the other hand desperately need to build a new dog pen, and struggle from paycheck to paycheck and have saved $ by putting into our 401K. He said that he has enough credit to handle if some disaster would happen ie need furnace or whatever. He says I can ask him for money, but I don't think I should have to! And, since he just paid for the tree, I didn't think I should ask him for a little while. He said that he paid for that w/money he "didn't have."
I am feeling v. emo right now and I admit this. I'm not sure how to handle this. Part of me wants to be done with him for being stingy with his money and not acting more married. Unfortunately, we did not talk about this before we got M and I didn't know it was going to be like this. He kept saying if/when things got better, we would combine money. Then in Dec. he said he would do right after the holidays. Am I wrong for feeling this way??
