Thanks NJ! Yesterday I took the day off. (H has been off all week). We went to lunch with his mom to the Cheesecake Factory! Yummy! It was nice. We came home, took a nap, and . It was nice b/c I asked him what he wanted me to do, and he said to use my imagination. I said, "I don't have much imagination right now." He said he didn't either. So, I said, "it's ok w/me if we have 'regular' sex!" He said it was for him too. I thought that was good b/c I don't want to feel like ML has to be a big production every single time and that he is ok with it too. Sure, I want to be adventurous and all, but sometimes I just want it. We exchanged some nice words. (Actually, I said some nice things and he agreed like "that was nice, ML all the time is so awesome, & I've enjoyed spending time off with you."
I have a lot of things in mind to accomplish in 2005. I can't wait for this year to be over.
I have been wondering if I have just brought this whole situation on myself. As Dr. Phil says, "what you fear, you create." I'm not sure exactly how he means it...Do any of you? Kind of like expanding the negative. I really feel like H has just been rebelling against me. He is so afraid to be controlled. Well, I guess we all are to some extent. Which means that *I need to quit trying so hard to get what I want. I re-read parts of DB and realized that I'm still doing more of the same re: asking for WOA. What works most is being able to feel secure about myself w/o depending on h for words-then he is more likely to give me words!
. It was nice b/c I asked him what he wanted me to do, and he said to use my imagination. I said, "I don't have much imagination right now." He said he didn't either. So, I said, "it's ok w/me if we have 'regular' sex!" He said it was for him too. I thought that was good b/c I don't want to feel like ML has to be a big production every single time and that he is ok with it too. Sure, I want to be adventurous and all, but sometimes I just want it. 
