Friday I went out to eat w/my sis & BIL. I ended up going home before 11, and H was home. We chit chatted for a few min., then I went into my room. He came in and leaned against the wall. I asked if he wanted to sit and he said yes. We talked more-just happy stuff-things we've been doing, etc. Then . I went to the bathroom after and he went to his bed. I hugged him goodnight & went back into his room.

Sat. we didn't see each other at all. I spent the day w/my mom and nephews. Didn't go out. Sun. I went for an organized ride (25 hilly miles) and then there was a picnic after. I came home and h was taking a nap. He got up to go somewhere. I went in and asked for a hug. Bad move-he was not very responsive and I was feeling needy. I really really miss him!

Later he came home, just said hi, but smiled this time, went to office. I cooked myself din. I asked if he had eaten and he said yes. Ignored each other the rest of the night. This morn. did not see each other.

I'm having a really hard time b/c I am struggling to pay my bills. Going out w/o him costs me money and all I have been doing is playing.

I went to IC today. I talked to her and she ended up agreeing with what I said last time. ???

I know I need to keep doing my own thing, but I am running out of things to do. Friends are busy w/other stuff, I have little $, etc. I was thinking about getting a second job or finding a new job altogether. If we were to D, I'd be screwed b/c I don't make enough to cover my bills and rent.

Grrr...
karen