Tonight was the first night of the music festival my H helps organize. It's a fun time for us, this is were we met, he is respected here, and I get to hang out with musicians, and realize I do still know something even though I'm more mom than musician right now, we meet friends we see once a year, yeah, probably lots of 'other validation', but it's a good time.
Tonight between concerts we actually went and sat and had a cup of coffee together. H filled me in on some festival gossip (something he hasn't done in years) and it was enjoyable. He made a comment that the wife of one of our musician friends was just the same age as I am, and said 'just think, you could be the wife of a world famous musician right now'. I made some comment about how he (the musician) was not really my type, and left it at that.
Later on, as we were coming out of the concert, I whispered to H that 'I wouldn't mind being your wife if you made love to me once in a while'. H smiled and laughted it off.
At home, I practiced for a while (yes, we keep late hours, especially during the festival) then H asked if I would watch TV with him. I tried snuggling up next to H, he pushed me away. I kissed him, only could reach his cheek, he responded by reading the text (we were watching a DVD, he had the Spanish text on so he could practice).
This went on, me trying to be friendly, he avoiding at all costs. I backed off, and he made some comments about how cute the kids had been today. I was biting my tongue to keep from asking why he wouldn't let me cuddle with him (should I ask him??)
I finally broke down and asked why he seemed to get so upset when I tried to touch him, I tried to explain how much I need to be touched, then he got 'huffy' and said he was tired and went up to bed.
Maybe after I've read the book I'll have a better idea how to go about approaching him...
