Ok dealing with some disappointment and hurt this morning.
I think last week I posted I thought CHL and I were being more respectful of one another.
I guess I really am blond and gullible.
Was he always sneaky and lying and I just didn't see it? Is that why he has affairs and can't manage a marriage?
I know as Sage pointed out to me people aren't all one way or the other. But I always thought of him as so honest and upstanding it hurts to find all of these things out about him.
He was in the house last week and picked up some bills and in my van and got his chair. Now the van is back next to the tree that is down and when I asked if he had looked at the tree he said no. When I mentioned the car insurance he said he had forgotten it.
Why lie? Why not just send me an e-mail if he doesn't want to talk and say, Oh by the way ran by the house and grabbed mail and my chair. I just don't understand the need to still sneak and lie to me.
I am not reacting and basically working on keeping calm. Mostly I think I am just disappointed in him.
Very soon my life will be totally my own to manage and he won't be able to affect me at all, and if I manage my feelings right, he can't affect me now. Only if I let it, so I am working to process it through.
Pam
"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us"
