I gotta wholeheartedly disagree that "needing sex is pathetic!" We are first and foremost biological creatures... animals. Our only indisputable "purpose" here on planet Earth is... no, not to DB... to procreate! Nature does not care what else we do, so long as we procreate... preferably, like bunnies, with whomever will lie still long enough for us to procreate with. This is a major reason the D rate is so high, because our cherished monogamy is unfortunately NOT in keeping with our biologic imperatives... hence one reason we engage in "serial monogamy" and not the real deal.
Sex is an instinctual DRIVE. As humans, we are biologically hard-wired to perceive it as a MAJOR "need" in order to insure the survival of our species. Whether or not our warped species deserves to survive is, of course, a matter of legitimate debate.
Sure, because of the grey matter on our brains, unlike other animals we can sometimes totally repress or sublimate the energy (libido) that is designed to be used for sex, if we so choose. But in my opinion, doing that for long periods, without really wanting to is... well, pathetic. Because it's an invalidation of our human nature.
"Needing in a vacuum" seems fine to me, as does "other validation" and "other soothing." Again, this is primal stuff. As a culture, in our pathologic fear of "co-dependence" we have gone WAY overboard in insisting upon an unrealistic and (I think) unhealthy level of self reliance.
Needs are not bad, in my opinion. To boil all "needs" down to mere "wants" makes for a rather tepid existence, does it not?
