I'm back at work. Still feeling a bit weak, but am happy to be back at work.
So...
I don't know if anyone who currently reads my thread remembers about the ex-girlfriend my husband had. They dated for 5 years before I came into the picture. They broke it off when they went to college...except her daddy works for an airline. So, she'd fly my husband out to visit her when she wanted a booty call. And she'd kick out whoever her current boyfriend was.
When he and I started dating, her phone calls to him increased. I spent the week with him and she called every night that I was there.
Once the week was over I told him that it seemed like the two of them had some unfinished business and that I didn't want to be the cause of any problems. He assured me that there were no issues, that she was just a friend.
And he told me that he definately wanted to continue to date me and was not interested in her.
We continued to date for about 5 months. He invited me up to meet his family for christmas.
While there, he called her on christmas eve. She wanted to come visit him.
I asked him please to not do this. He insisted they were just friends.
I told him if he slept with her it was over between us.
The night we got back to his apartment, I overheard his roomates telling him he was being stupid. To not have the ex over.
Again, he insisted nothing would happen that they were just friends.
He picked her up from the airport by himself.
She and I had a private talk in which she told me that she always thought he'd be hers forever. And that she was just dating while in college.
I told her I was sorry for her pain, that I understood where she was coming from, and that I had no problem with them being friends.
They took me back to my college and she spent 3 more days there.
He did cheat on me and lied to me about it.
And didn't confess until after we had been married a year...and only because I badgered him into it.
She continued to contact him after our marriage.
I would flip out each and every time.
It caused great mayham.
The last time she called, she had already gotten married herself.
She and a girlfriend called our house. Husband and I had just finished making love, it was midnight, and the phone rang.
It was on my side of the bed.
I answered and they hung up.
This happened twice more.
Finally husband grabbed the phone.
The girlfriend of his ex began speaking to him, asking him if he remembered his ex.
Then ex came on the phone.
I realized who was on the phone and reached over and hit the button to hang up the phone.
Then I took it off the hook and started screaming.
At this point, we'd been married for 3 years and she was still calling.
I handled myself very badly of course.
No grace and dignity whatsoever.
Full blown panic attack...althought I didn't realize what it was at the time.
We plotted our plan and then put the phone back on the hook.
As soon as it was back on the hook, the phone rang.
He picked it up. Verified that it was his ex.
And said to her, "I thought you were happily married now, why the [beep] are you still harrasing my wife and I? Leave us alone!"
I was relieved cause he had FINALLY stood up to her and told her to get out of his life.
Life continues. Anytime a girl looks at him funny I freak out.
Lots of distrust on my part. Lots of shame on his part.
Sigh.
Fast forward to our separation. I let go of a lot of anger, told him I forgave him everything.
The whole time we were separated he didn't not call her, contact her. Told me after we reconciled that he just wasn't interested.
