Ancient as a stone, strong as the sea

[psluke]

Hi PIB,

I hope you don't mind if I hijack a bit of space. Still don't feel like starting a thread.

I am finding lots of useful info for me in your threads. In the beginning I went back and read threads through, then I started following so many people and posting so much I didn't have time to go back and read past histories. I think it would have been good for me to do that more.

I read Calystra's again last night, it is one that I had read all the way through and I saw things different in it this year than last year when I read it. I believe it is the difference in me that is allowing me to see things differently. I like the differences in me and the different things I am picking up on in my reading now.

I actually at this point believe it is going to be good for me to move into my own place. I e-mailed a friend this morning that I believe God directed me to this house. I need to do more healing and I think it is possible that what I need to do to make the progress is here at this new location.

If I had got the first house or even stayed at PK I believe I would have crawled into a hole and stayed there. Especially when the Zoloft ends. That scares me. But here I have already met two lovely neighbors and see possibilities of some form of friendship developing that may help me go in directions I need to go to continue healing.

Not that I wouldn't have loved to save this marriage, I just believe I would need more healing time before I was ready to be back together full time. I actually believe I needed healing time 6 years ago BEFORE marrying David.

Thank you for the space.

Have a lovely day!

PS Promise to start new thread before long and not hijack space again!