Me-32 H-32 together 16 years, married 5 S-10 Cat-12
Hi, everybody! I haven't been around in a while because my PMA has been down. My H has been running back and forth from our home to wash clothes, have dinner if I cook, spend time with son, watch son in our house when I am not home. HE feels free to sleep in our bed and go thru my things.
I wouldn't dare go to MIL's and I do have a key to go thru his things or sleep in his bed!!!!! He would have a baby!
Finally, after 5 mos of this behavior and Ml 1-2 times a week. SOmetimes after Ml he will be mean and when we get around family members he acts like nothing is going on between us! WTF
Finally I get fed up and set boundaries visit S @ moms, Get him every other weekend, no in and out, no washing your clothes here, call before you come. He says Let's D, we can go to a L together. I said, I will not go w/u. YOu make decision best for the family . That was 2wks ago.
I found out there is OW by snooping. I know 2x4. I accessed his cell bill online. It is atleast an EA possible PA. He of course denies it. She is just a friend.........ok. If she is just a friend how come I never heard him mention her nname in a friendly manor. He met her when he took a realestate class. The woman use to call my house! Anyway that is neither here nor there. I haven't bought it up in about 2-3 wks. He keeps making references to me having a boyfriend. I guess that is guilt and trying to justify his behavior.
He had a PA about 1.5 years ago. He never really showed a lot of remorse. He said he was orry and it was because he was not getting enuff Sex. It was in other words my fault. I held it in and never talk to anyone about it. Then summer 03, I start going out and enjoying myself and get involved in an EA. He suspected something but could never prove it and I never admitted it per C. It seems while he was trying to woo me back he was already talking to OW and she was nursing his wounds being manipulative and now he is seeing her. SHe is probably the reason he left home. He keeps giving me all of these dumb excuses that don't add up! TOO LITTLE TOO LAte = there is someone else! It is never too late when there is no one else involved. HOw did he go from wanting to have another child in Aug. to TOO LITTLE TOO LATE in Dec.? It is because there is someone else. He will never admit it though. I am at my wits end.
My other thread is in Piecing. It called what next? I don't know how to link threads.
Are boundaries pushing him closer to OW? He would be w/her if he wants to anyway...right. HElp please!!!!!!!!!!
6/4/04 Ok...boundaries in place for 6wks...........It seems like a long time. I guess it took him more than 6wks to decide to leave, HUh? It Will take longer than 6 wks to come back home..Arghhhhhh
I invited him over on son's Bday. He had dinner w/us and stayed and watched TV until midnite.
No ML for 6 wks.
Boundaries are still in place. Any ideas on how to ease up on boundaries without making it look like I am not pursuing ?
OK....so he is calling a lot more. He is asking what's up w/me. Finding any reason to ask a question or call me at work or home(strange hours of the night).
Boundaries Making Changes and I am loving the new me
Last thread was Boundaries. I don't know how to link. I will figure it out!
Me-32 H-32 together 16 years, married 5 S-10 Cat-12
Hi, everybody! I haven't been around in a while because my PMA has been down. My H has been running back and forth from our home to wash clothes, have dinner if I cook, spend time with son, watch son in our house when I am not home. HE feels free to sleep in our bed and go thru my things.
I wouldn't dare go to MIL's and I do have a key to go thru his things or sleep in his bed!!!!! He would have a baby!
Finally, after 5 mos of this behavior and Ml 1-2 times a week. SOmetimes after Ml he will be mean and when we get around family members he acts like nothing is going on between us! WTF
Finally I get fed up and set boundaries visit S @ moms, Get him every other weekend, no in and out, no washing your clothes here, call before you come. He says Let's D, we can go to a L together. I said, I will not go w/u. YOu make decision best for the family . That was 2wks ago.
I found out there is OW by snooping. I know 2x4. I accessed his cell bill online. It is atleast an EA possible PA. He of course denies it. She is just a friend.........ok. If she is just a friend how come I never heard him mention her nname in a friendly manor. He met her when he took a realestate class. The woman use to call my house! Anyway that is neither here nor there. I haven't bought it up in about 2-3 wks. He keeps making references to me having a boyfriend. I guess that is guilt and trying to justify his behavior.
He had a PA about 1.5 years ago. He never really showed a lot of remorse. He said he was orry and it was because he was not getting enuff Sex. It was in other words my fault. I held it in and never talk to anyone about it. Then summer 03, I start going out and enjoying myself and get involved in an EA. He suspected something but could never prove it and I never admitted it per C. It seems while he was trying to woo me back he was already talking to OW and she was nursing his wounds being manipulative and now he is seeing her. SHe is probably the reason he left home. He keeps giving me all of these dumb excuses that don't add up! TOO LITTLE TOO LAte = there is someone else! It is never too late when there is no one else involved. HOw did he go from wanting to have another child in Aug. to TOO LITTLE TOO LATE in Dec.? It is because there is someone else. He will never admit it though. I am at my wits end.
My other thread is in Piecing. It called what next? I don't know how to link threads.
Are boundaries pushing him closer to OW? He would be w/her if he wants to anyway...right. HElp please!!!!!!!!!!
6/4/04 Ok...boundaries in place for 6wks...........It seems like a long time. I guess it took him more than 6wks to decide to leave, HUh? It Will take longer than 6 wks to come back home..Arghhhhhh
I invited him over on son's Bday. He had dinner w/us and stayed and watched TV until midnite.
No ML for 6 wks.
Boundaries are still in place. Any ideas on how to ease up on boundaries without making it look like I am not pursuing ?
OK....so he is calling a lot more. He is asking what's up w/me. Finding any reason to ask a question or call me at work or home(strange hours of the night).
