Write it in your journal and use it against her? Afraid you're tryint to take the kids away from her? Where does she get that you're an aggressive ogre? Does she have access to a journal of yours?
You did a wonderful job of not flying off the handle or walking away as she obviously needed to vent. As long as you continue to be the calm and grounded one, she will run out of steam at some point. I can't remember, is she going to a therapist?
Throwing herself at you and being sarcastically wanton is very provocative behavior, and it surprises me that she is equating R with sex, especially when you aren't making any overtures to her in that respect (are you?) It sounds like really desperate behavior, too, which may or may not be connected with EA with OM. Speaking to him may not be a good idea, but it may not be a bad idea either (how's that for good, solid advice?).
Actually, as I type it occurs to me (and forgive me if I have forgotten something aready posted about your sitch, but...) Could it possibly be that she feels rejected by you in some strange way? That her desperation is caused somehow by not having had the attention (physical or otherwise) she needed from you? I'm not saying this as a big DUH, but as a more specific way to think about her treatment of her own body when she talks about sex with you.
Anyway, I'm about fried, but I wanted to chime in with my .0175.
