Raindeer and KAW--after tonight, I think I'm following right behind you. Not really a new twist, but events like tonight have not occurred in several months.
I was taking the train home with TKKC1. S10 and D9's school had an open house tonight.
LIWAW: Calls semi-frantically asking if I can stay home and let her go alone because her mother left angry and father was near having a heart attack given our sitch and they can't take it any more. She says she'll call her lawyer and stop everything.
Merrick: I say I intend to go tonight.
LIWAW: You never go (I correct her) and it figures your so f***ng selfish that you won't give my father a break.
Merrick: I offer to call my parents and go in her place, but she refuses.
As I walk towards my house, I said, "Jesus, I'm going to need you right by my side when I walk through the door."
When I get home, she's in rare form saying that she got her Aunt to come over, that I win, she'll call of the lawyer and stop eveything tomorrow and that we'll live as H & W. She jumps on me and and wraps her legs around me saying we should go together tonight and that she'll sleep in the bed of her loving H go to C and do whatver it takes. She says this will be a lot for her and may have to kill herself--no wait, W says she won't really do that because I'll just write that down in my journal and use it against her.
I tried to show empathy by looking right into her eyes, but had a hard time keeping a straight face or not smirking--but held back for the most part. I said, I will not talk about these things in th house and said I knew she had strong feelings right now and may want to think about them overnight.
Five minutes later she returns saying that she will live with me, but as a mother of our kids and not as H & W and that she will never fall in love with me again and can barely look at me. She says again that she'll just stop the lawyer so I can stop paying mine.
I wanted to say don't fire your lawyer because I may file, but simply responded to her I won't ever love you with a "Yes. I know" I then said I wanted to take separate cars tonight and split our time with the teachers, but that she could go out with her mom friends after (and she'll almost certainly call OM).
I've played this scene many times before and they usually occur when she is spending more time contacting OM--and I suspect she precipitated the blowout with her parents in some form or another, but really won't pry on this because it doesn't matter.
To be perfectly honest, I'm not happy about her feeling the pressure because I was thinking the Sep/D talk would finally bring some other issues to a head--and who knows, maybe this was her convulated way of avoiding that.
I may have to consult with DB Coach Laurie, but the plus side is that I did not respond angrily, Jesus must have stood with me because I remain calm about the circumstances and I fully understand the need to disregard most of W's remarks. And maybe I have a break to continue pursuing my goals--although W has always been compelled to intensify the drama.
