Thanks for stopping by my thread. I see from yours that things aren't so hot right now. But it's okay to vent.
Where do you live in Ohio? I'll be there in two weeks for a couple of days with my kids.
Quote: I think I'd be careful to not have W feel like she has to make concessions. Fairness and reality (things our W's simply do not understand) should not be approached as concessions. That may be the legal term, but emotionally, a S agreement should help get our Ws in touch with reality, not feel resentful they had to "give something up".
This has been an issue I've been avoiding and is the flip side of my capitulation to ease any tension. What I want to do is get the best deal I can for myself as a legal matter. There is aboslutely nothing that precludes me from giving her more outside of a legal agreement -- and I may even do so. But as a matter of law, I am going to make sure that I protect myself (and the assets available for my kids) as much as possible.
On the lighter side, we have new neighbors moving in across the street later this week and the H was there yesterday and came by to say hello. It turns out he AND his W are psychotherapists specializing in M and couples counseling!!! He ought to make a fortune on my block.
I also started to have money discussions with W to begin agreeing on our expenses and assets in preparation for a separation. At one point I raised issues relating to litigation expenses which could end up costing tens of thousands of dollars. She asked what sense it made for me to fight her--and I replied that I'd need a minimum of $5k for a Sep. Agreement and may need even more $$$ if I decide to file against her. . This obviously surprised her and she said she thought I didn't want this. I said that now that we are going down this path, I need to keep all my options open. At this point I backed off and decided to just let this sink in for her.
Tonight could be interesting. I have an event with my son that we have to attend while W is going to a political event where she will be with OM. This usually leads to bad things later in the night--but perhaps having my son with me when I get home will spare us from an "event".
. This obviously surprised her and she said she thought I didn't want this. I said that now that we are going down this path, I need to keep all my options open. At this point I backed off and decided to just let this sink in for her.
