So, after my little crash and burn...I'm feeling pretty good. But H isn't. He has apologized several times the last couple of days, and at pretty random times. (Driving home from the gym, watching non-A-related TV...heck, he even woke me up last night to tell me. )

It feels good to know he realizes he made a mistake. That reassures me that it was a mistake. We are all human. (I can't say I didn't contemplate it myself one night, feeling all alone and unwanted...so I can understand what may have motivated him.) And it helps to know that if he feels bad, then I seriously doubt he would do this sort of nonsense again.

But I wish I could help him feel better. I know I can't make it go away--only time does that--but I wish I knew how to help comfort him. I know that's what I want when I go to him upset. My standard answer to "I'm sorry" has been "I know." I've tried ILY and telling him I forgive him. Maybe I just need to let him be upset.

H did say the sweetest thing last night, and I wanted to make sure that I remember it... It was when he came in and woke me up to tell me he was sorry. (He had gone out for a little while, must have been just after he came home.) I remember him laying on top of me on top of the covers, and telling me that he was upset and how sorry he was, and that he couldn't believe he had acted like that. And I told him it was okay. I remember him saying he was sorry, that he had "issues." (Childhood traumas.) I told him it was okay, and that I was here for him. He said he hadn't realized that before, but he knew that now. I thought it was the sweetest thing I had ever heard...

[color:"purple"]Nevanna[/color]