Okay, realized I have been doing this too much with H, so I need to vent about that skank xrm.

I had a dream the other morning, right before I got up. XRM was at some wedding where H and I were. She was following him around like some lost puppy the whole time, and being the respectful and nice person that I am, I kept my distance to let H handle things the way he wanted. After awhile, I got fed up of being away from my my H just to "keep the peace" because she was around. So I headed over to tell her to bug off. As I walked over, xrm leans over to kiss H--and he kisses her back. I go absolutely nuts, grab her by the hair and haul her backwards, screaming "Get off my husband you filthy whore!" And then proceed to just absolutely beat on her--pounding on her, kicking her, as she just lays in this lump on the ground. In the back of my mind, I'm thinking that this is not the way to handle it--there are tons of people watching...but it just seemed like I was watching myself doing all these. I remember trying to scream, and having the hardest time waking up. When I did, my heart was racing and I nearly fell out of bed.

The whole thing really freaked me out. Even though it was a dream, I was really disturbed by how badly I just lost it. Not like me at all. And then, I had that image of them kissing just permanantly fixed in my mind. It took me over a day for the "reality" of it to fade away and feel more like a dream.

(Although, in the dream, I pictured her fat and ugly. H thought that was funny, since I do know what she looks like.) I did break down, and ask him again if there was ever anything between them. (Yeah, I know...bad me...but I had just had the dream...) And he said no. I asked if he would have told me, and he said yes. (With the first sep, it took him all of one day to come clean about the PA. I think the guilt was too much.)

Anyway, he has put off meeting with her to return the last of her things the past couple of days. (Just odds and ends he found while unpacking.) Was doing stuff with me, and just didn't want to deal with her.

So last night we went to his storage unit to dig a couple of things out and to rearrange it so we can add some of my stuff. While we were there, xrm called. (Stupid skank.) He ignored it the first time, then finally went out to answer it the second time.

While he was talking to her, I ran across a folded up piece of paper. Dunno why I was curious, but I opened it up. Obviously not H's handwriting. Anyway, I started reading it, wondering what it was. At first I thought it was some kind of poem. Actually, I thought it sounded kind of neat. It was describing the peaceful feelings in a cemetary.

Okay, maybe I'm weird, but I like cemetaries. They are very connected places, full of history and people. I find them very relaxing. So I thought this was kind of neat to read.

A couple of paragraphs in, it got weird. Started taling about some kind of conversation in a cemetary and how that was the beginning of a love. (??) Then it stated: "A love now forbidden by another's love." (????) then it ended up saying something bizarre about being "born, living, and dieing" in a cemetary.

I showed it to H when he came back in--not accusatory or anything, just like "What in the world is this weird thing?" He read through it, and had a pretty confused look on his face. He thought it was as strange as I did--said it did look like her handwriting. He asked where I got it, and I told him. We decided maybe it was some bizarre attempt at a "love letter" meant for him to find. He mentioned that I should keep it, for evidence. (We've been looking or paying attention to any messages from her that were strange like that, just in case, since she's a real nut case.)

I did break down last night, and ask him to make her go away. I hadn't done that before. But I said I really needed her to be gone. He asked me if I wanted him to tell her to stop calling, and I said yes. (DUH!) He said that, when he finally did meet with her he was going to tell her to stop the calls. (He's also planning on telling her that I'm pregnant--even thought I'm not--to scare her away.)

I am just soooo sick of her! (And people like her!) H told me that she actually said to him, awhile back, that she "did everything right, and still didn't win"--meaning get him. Well, duh! He's married!! WTF is right with that?? Nothing! And on top of that, she still calls him--and still calls multiple times in a row if he doesn't answer. How annoying is that??

I guess xrm also got jealous that H hung out some with a FF of hers--a FF who has a live-in BF. Um, yeah. WTF right does xrm think she has to get jealous??? And, according to H, xrm was constantly cheating on her ex-bf...and then would get jealous when ex-bf would talk to other women. Um, yeah. Mixed up priorities!

What really ticks me off is that she just doesn't get it. She keeps calling and calling and calling and calling... For the most part, I've tried to stay out of it. (It's hard for me.) I've let him handle it how he wanted. But now, I've just had enough. I understood when she was acting all nuts (ie, when we think she may have been stalking him) why he would talk to her or put up with some of her nonsense. At that point, it probably really was dangerous to tell her to bug off.

But this is just stupid. I'm not going to keep holding my breath because of that whore any more. I start to feel almost normal....and then she calls. I mean, when is she going to get it?? He's a M-A-R-R-I-E-D person...that means he's not available.

Okay, feeling better now...calmer...

I'm pretty sure nobody actually bothered to read all of that blabbering nonsense. But, well, whatever, I certainly feel better.

[color:"purple"]Nevanna[/color]