Just remember, if you "pursue" and you get a negative response (regularly) you will definitely want to pull back. It does not matter what your H was like "before" all of his "craziness". As much as you might be "sure" that he needs/wants your attentions, it is just the opposite.

The "Pride" that BnB spoke of really is a common denominator among MOST men. Sure, most ALL men like to be pursued. (THAT is a very big "ego stroker"!) You just need to really know how to read the signals they are giving out at THIS totally crazy time in their lives. Most times , if they are in another R, "pursuing" just makes them feel guilty (and ALL kinds of other feelings) that they don't/can't deal with.

I have found that when I "pulled back" that I was able to "stroke" that ego by making sure I said something positive about his work or anything he did for the kids or around the house every day. That NEVER got a negative response. He just kind of looked at me and didn't say anything ... at first! Later I learned that he WAS listening, 'cause I heard him say something to a good friend of his, how I liked it when he did "such and such" ... you could tell that he was proud of what he did. This was a "safe" way to make sure my H knew I was thinking very positively of him and giving him his "strokes". Again, the "key" is knowing how to read the signals your H is giving off ...

Have a great day, Deb!

TC