First I want to clear something up...these actions you listed...are you asking her to do any and all of these or just some of these things? Speaking as a post-ld person...this list would have scared the hell out of me when I was LD. I would agree that these things shouldn't be unreasonable and to a HD person they aren't at all...it's almost 2nd nature. Here's why an LD person may find these things daunting....
- initiating sex 40-50% of the time (it takes courage to do this...this is perhaps the most scary thing you could ask....I'd cut this % way back at first 25% perhaps, then ask her to increase as time goes by.) - vocal expressions of sexual desire/enjoyment (from “I’ve been thinking of being with you tonight” to specific likes and desires [the more graphic the better]) (Ok this may not be so difficult, but don't demand graphics yet...it may come with time...but you may never get that one completely.) - trying new sexual positions (I don't feel this is too much to ask...not when you are already ML, I don't see why you wouldn't get this when you're already getting some ) - sexual touches and gropes (at home and elsewhere) (Define for her what "sexual touches" are to you...her definition may not be the same as yours...this too is attainable) - sex outside of the bedroom (outdoors, other rooms, vehicles, etc.) (Don't go nuts on this one yet, take it slow...familiar different rooms in the house to begin with perhaps?) - mid-day quickies (doable) - wake up sex or middle of the night sex (Do you know if she wakes up in the middle of the night, or is she a sound sleeper?) - being “done” (you're going to have to define this more...you being done and her being done are two different things.) - oral or manual activity when intercourse isn’t possible (reasonable) - flashing me or going without underwear (this will be reasonable if/when she's comfortable with her own body...if she already is great! You just might get this one too fairly quickly.)
Hopefully a few of these suggestions to your list will help you define for your LDW exactly what it is you want...that she can give at this point...then maybe you can come to an agreement on some of them.
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