It was an interesting phenomena. Our frequency last calendar year was 4 times. When I started this whole process, I was horny to the point of wackiness. Other members on this board remember how completely bizzare my posts were because I was thinking that I wanted swinging, porn-star, kinky, crazy sex 2-3 times a day etc. It was really due to my need to "relax" my anxieties about other things in my life and for the treacherous mistake of needing validation. PM solved the anxiety thing over night and I no longer allowed myself to want sex unless it was to "connect" emotionally with my W. This "logic" dropped my needs down to a reasonable number of 2 times per week. When we started doing it regularly, I realized that I didn't really want it even that much. My motivation to maintain the frequency was more about "training the habit" in my W. But the reality is that 2-3 times seems to be the right number for me.
Note that the first convo I had with my W after reading SSM, I told her that 2x per month would be the bare minimum but later revised it to 2x week. That was a mistake because she felt like I was moving the target. At the time 2x per month sounded huge! 24x / year versus 4.
We have been having spurts of 2x week and even a 3fer once. But looking at the numbers, we've only ML about 13x since Feb but have had quite a few sessions of manual stuff in between.
Anywhere is walking distance if you have the time
-Steven Wright
