Thank you for so much support and insight on my thread. I greatly appreciate you. I cannot answer for our H's. I cannot even seem to pose the right questions anymore. But I do believe in living my intentions as clearly as I can.
Somehow I think that the intentions we have are the very root of all communication. I believe that despite the words we say, the underlying feelings and intentions are present in the results we get. Somehow, we may say the right thing but convey less in our unspoken subtle finer communcations.
I cannot WILL this to change. I cannot even identify the ways in which my intentions are not supporting my "stated" outcome. For now, I am looking for ways to clean up the ambiguous messages I seem to be giving.
I believe that I am ambivalent about my db efforts. I think I need to actually believe and SEE the COMPLETE possibility of a fully realized relationship actually being possible. If I see less than... or believe less than that...well...then I suppose, that is what I will communicate.. whether I mean to or not.
Make sense?
Not easy. I will be gone this weekend...but checking in as soon as I get back. For now, I thin that you are really facing this issue of your own path and sorting out your own ambiguities.
I believe it IS possible to place your true hopes and desires in a full reconciliation in your situation, Slowly. I believe it can be done without your feeling like a chump. Take your time. Decide what YOU feel YOU now want in your life. And make it clear to yourself. (that ought to be SOOOOOOOO easy, don't ya think? LOL)
