I can relate to your Q about H seems to accomodate to 'hurt'. My H is like that too. He told me all of the things OW told him of her hurting, she is having a breakdown, etc. etc. and H only accomodates more to him. I didnt do all that coz I know it will pressure him and push him into a corner. He will want to be with me coz he of sympathy but not coz he wants to be with me. I am puzzled about this also. So, if we can attract H by telling him how hurt we are by his actions, where does dropping the rope, acting as if and play hard to get comes in?
SOmetimes I feel tht if I tell H of how hurt I am, he will come around to me but it will be out of obligation instead of him volunteering to be with me. I remembered now that during our S, I once told him that I was hurt coz I felt like he didnt show respect for my feelings by text messaging OW in front of me. But he responded by being angry and said not to put any guilt on him coz he hated feeling guilty.
I dont know if my rambling makes sense...
Sometimes the very thing you're looking for is the one thing you can't see..
