My first thought was to blast you for that. However, your viewpoint may be helpful to some of us. There may be some good points to the post but much of it is as helpful as telling an allergy sufferer to stop sniveling.
Many of us have been way out of our comfort zone for a very long time. The cravings we feel are physical. I, for one, have tried multiple times to approach celebacy because the whole hassle just isn't worth it. But I can't leave my need and my need just won't leave me. I just doesn't work.
For many of us, the sex during our respective courtships was fabulous. But, the day after the wedding everything changed and the ache we felt was callously dismissed with "is that all you ever think about?"
But we are the loyal ones. We read books and bang our heads against the wall trying to figure out a way to find some peace within our marriages. Find a way to get our spouses to celebrate our union. To make love with us because we can't do it alone and there's no one else we can ethically do it with.
Many of our spouses expect us to give up sex entirely. They are denying who and what we are and often do their best to belittle and take advantage of us because of our desire. A desire that is a need.
Sex within a marriage is so important that it's even addressed in the New Testement (1Cor-7) Paul says if you can't live a celebate life, get a spouse so you don't sin. Once married you must share your bodies with each other unless you both agree to become celebate. This is so you don't sin by persuing your needs outside the holy union of marriage.
We're fighting with everything we have to improve our marriages and many of our spouses JUST DON'T CARE. If not for the kids and not for the vows - we'd be long gone. Many of us have compromised and changed as much as we can. It would be nice if some of our respective spouses would lift a finger in support or encouragement.
Our desire isn't going to go away - as much as we've tried to ignore it. Do you have some insight into how we could interest our repective spouses in joining with us in a carnel marital union?
