You're absolutely right that the biggest thing you need right now is patience. I know a little bit about patience as I'm in my 7th month of an in-house separation. So, in my view it's a big positive that you'll be sharing a house AND bed .
My advice is to keep going about your business almost as if you have been while he's gone - I mean don't immediately change how and when you do everything. You don't want him to feel any pressure to perform as a perfect, loving husband immediately. But, be sure to always be positive and inclusive, but not show any dissatisfaction if he has 'other plans'. Always act as if you believe everything is going to work out, but also no pushing to make things happen.
Remember to keep 'having a life' instead of becoming wrapped up in H's issues. I don't know much about OW issues, but from what I've read, I think that you have to accept from the start that he won't be able to let go completely all at once. They'll probably still be lots of guilt and conflict going on in his brain. I imagine this will be the toughest part so I would prepare yoursef to face OW stuff (and show not too much anger/upset). You've got a perfect right to be upset and angry but I think you may have to wait a while before letting too much of it out.
It's a great sign that he wants to get a new job, and a great chance for you to validate his skills and abilities.
I think you're thinking correctly - you be the classy one and let the OW beg, cry, and plead (and push him further away).
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