Friends, Squatters & Lurkers--Fishbowl musings

[Underdog]

Howdy all,

Briget, I'll make it over your way next and will try to check back in a little while.

First, many thanks and big hugs to my IM buddies, e-mail buddies and phone chat buddies... all of you. It's helped me over the past week and a half.

Pen, thank you (as always) for putting things out here in such a crystal clear fashion. I DO appreciate that, and you are very gifted with that ability.

I've mainly been concentrating on telling my family members and friends about my decision... and boy, has this been difficult. Everyone is very supportive, some have had reservations about my entire marriage and are now feeling they can be honest with me, and others are just plain sad.

My dad did send me a really terrific e-mail this morning (he has a knack for bringing tears with his eloquence) after our very lengthy convo last night. He commented to me that he's had a feeling all along that Mr. Wonderful would put the decision in my hands... something he feels is grossly unfair. I agree, but it's necessary to get myself to the next level.

But he did reiterate last night and again this morning that he and Mom only want me to be happy and in a position to be loved by someone who truly wants me some day.

I'll be working on the filing issue with Mr. W. in the next few days so we can get this process moving. I'd really like to begin my 2005 with peace--and just spend this time really concentrating on my girls and our lives together, making all these bizarre puzzle pieces fit in some fashion.

My posting is going to be sporadic until then, and when this thread runs out, I think I'll be posting to others instead of putting my drama out here for the world. Or maybe I'll post in Hopefulness... for all of us who are hopeful that the next lesson will be gentle and a heck of a lot more loving.

Thanks for all your great words! You know I appreciate every single one of them.

Betsey