Friends, Squatters & Lurkers--Fishbowl musings

[SadBurl]

the trainer there was thrilled that i have already lost 60 pounds, told me today when i went in for my free training session that he wanted me to be his personal project for the rest of the way to my goal.

Kitti is he young and hunky even old and hunky YOU GO GIRL!

when I first came to this board, I had the fixed impression in my head that any marriage vulnerable to an affair must be in some way fundamentally flawed. Then, as I progressed, I considered that perhaps, it needn’t always be like that – that in some cases, one person’s problems and demons past and future might be quite sufficient to break a marriage apart, even if the other person is doing everything “right” (classical midlife crisis scenario).

I found this comment very interesting. Yes when a S has an affair the first one to be blamed is the LBS. Ok sometimes it is the case and the WA cannot be blamed alone for the break down. I know in my sitch I maybe didn't do everything right but I tried damn hard (maybe too hard)

Something that cracks me up is how everyone else tells me how wonderful I am: my parents (well its their job ) H parents and siblings, my friends, H workmates I even thing H believes it so why is he not by my side. Does the blame lie with H who when things get tough instead of facing up to them would rather walk away? (And when you have someone to walk to it makes is easier)

Don't get me wrong I don't blame H for any of this. I'm well past that. I know he has fundamental flaws and problems with dealing with things these I have accepted. Now all I have to do is make him realise this make him see that we can work through things and that I love him for who he is.

Do you think that it is too easy to get married? (I mean ths papers are full of it Brittany, J-lo, Brad Pit saying he didn't think marriage was for life (bit of a get out clause there if you ask me)) What sort of message is this sending to people? People think oh well if it doesn't work out at least we can get divorced. So is you don't think its for keep then why get married? Why not just live together? That's what I love about this site. Here we have a collection of people who do belive in marriage, know its hard work but believe its worth it.

Ok that's my rant. Hope you all had a wonderful 4th July. (I loved that holiday when I lived in the states)

God bless