smiles, I think too often LD/HD conflicts in M are caused by control issues. I also think that's the stupidest reason on earth to fight about sex, but I'm HD, and I imagine all HDs would think so, too. It's the only thing that explains why my W, who shows glimpses of being a sexual person would sabotage her own happiness.
I wish I had some answers for you. I'd use them myself.
