Too often we forget that the whole deal about being 'in love' is enjoying together the rituals of daily life - and just how much sweeter even the mundane things are because we are sharing them with a loved one.
Minnie -- ARE you out there? your thread is locked!
PLEASE don't jump to conclusions about your h depositing money and thinking that's because he's really on the D path...my two cents is that your h is FINALLY coming to grips with his responsiblities and righting what has been a wrong (no suppport of dd) all along.
Can you act positively about this? I'm very concerned that your ASSumptions and interpretation of this will lead you to react to h in a negative way...can you try acting "as if"??
Sage
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
h also told me the other day to set aside memorial weekend 2005 -- It's a week after I graduate from grad school and apparently he already has a PLAN
18 months ago he couldn't see any future for us! but NOW!
********** Have a busy one today but as of tonight I am DONE with school for 8 weeks! (well, almost, I do have a paper due by 7/9 but I'm feeling ok with that). I have 4 things due into my class tonight! Yikes! Luckily most are in good shape already.
the last couple of days have been good. school for both of us on monday. last night h had school but I didn't. I went and got a pedicure which took quite a while because I was the last client of the day and the woman and I had a very interesting conversation about marriage (hers). She's been married for 10 years...2 kids...she basically got pregnant a month after she met her h! Told me the story of how they met (right after a devastating breakup for her, he was smitten right away!) and how over the last 10 years they have learned to treat each other with kindness and respect and make each other and their m. a priority. She told me that a few years ago she realized that she was unhappy in the m. so she set out to understand what was working, what wasn't and how to fix it! Sounds like she was DB'ing without even knowing it! Turns out that the biggest change for her came after they started "dating" each other again...really setting aside time each week. What was PARTICULARLY interesting about that was that she said that for the first few months they almost exclusively did things that interested him (sports, his type of movies,etc) but that gradually he started planning stuff with her in mind.
A nice example (I thought) about getting what YOU want by putting the other person first.
anyway, she was so joyful about her m and had clearly put effort and thought into it. Other stuff -- she said that she no longer personalized her h's reactions, that she herself had worked on her own anger and resentment, etc.
GOOD STUFF!
h got home from class and we watched the sox get trounced. went to bed and both got up EARLY to go to the gym. H was crabby this AM but knew it...apologized for it -- NO PROBLEM, I said! he's got a lot on his plate!
He's heading out with the guys tonight...I've got class (last one!). Tomorrow? Date night!
This weekend is gonna be awesome! We're celebrating my bday (belated!) with an overnight in town, tea at a fancy hotel, lots of walking around, relaxing, room service breakfast -- who knows what else?
Sage
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
Are you sure you want to put Pamila thru all that??
A while ago I started going thru all of my threads and creating a document of "key ideas that worked really well" -- I got about halfway thru, I think...will pick it up again now that school is out. My plan is to post the key ideas for me in summary as a reference...sometimes I forget!
As for the IM stuff...I think I loaded it once and I think I have a user name but I honestly don't think I've ever really done it realtime. Let me look into it.
But tell me...what is troubling you? Let's talk here for now since it's likely to take me a while to work out the IM stuff...
Sage
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.